Kate's Blog

3 Mindset Mistakes That Make Sobriety Harder

September’s here and that back-to-school feeling is in the air.

If you’ve been drinking more than you planned to over the past few months, now is as good a time as any to turn over a new leaf and get back on track. 

In today’s blog, I’m talking about how to avoid 3 common mindset mistakes that can make sobriety much harder than it needs to be!

Key points

Mindset mistake 1: Turning “I don’t want to” into a big deal

In other areas of life, we don’t let “but I don’t want to” put us off. We get up early when we want to lie in. We tidy up. We go to work. We don’t wait until we feel motivated – sometimes things just have to get done, no matter what.

It’s normal to feel resistant to things at times. It only becomes a problem when we talk ourselves into thinking that we should wait until we feel more inspired before we can take action.

Mindset mistake 2: Slashing your car tyres

Getting a flat tyre is annoying. It’s a temporary setback – but that’s all it is. What you don’t do is get so mad that you slash your other three tyres so you’re well and truly screwed. So don’t do this with sobriety either.

One bad day doesn’t need to lead to four bad days. Don’t abandon your sober car in a ditch because it’s got one flat tyre or the windscreen wipers have stopped working. The quicker you get back on the road, the quicker you’ll get to where you want to go.

Mindset mistake 3: Asking pointless questions

Pointless questions include: “Why is everything so hard for me?” “Why can’t I get anything right?” and “Why can’t I quit drinking?” These are terrible, pointless questions because you can’t possibly answer them in a way that helps you move forward.

Don’t waste time and energy answering pointless questions – just ask better questions instead. For example – “I’ve noticed I’m finding this hard right now. What help could I get to make this easier?” Or, “What’s one thing I’m willing to do differently next time?”

Ready to create an alcohol-free life you love? Click here to learn more about my Getting Unstuck course.

Hi, I'm Kate

I founded The Sober School to show you there’s another way out of your shame that doesn’t involve AA or rehab. 

Comments

10 responses

  1. I liked the analogy about slashing all the tires so true I do that all the time

    Like throwing in the towel
    Well I’ll try
    Saying what can I do differ ent

    Stop having a hangover then

  2. Hello Kate,
    Thank you very much for your blogs. They very inspiring. I’m enjoying them very much. Can’t wait for the next one. God bless

  3. Thank you Kate . I am finding your talks really helpful and thought provoking. Just had visitors all last week so we had a cocktail and wine every evening with dinner. I am now looking forward to a busy September…..getting back to my exercise regime and my art work. My goal for September is to have an alcohol free month so I shall be referring back to the week workshop and listening to your blogs….and trying not to constantly beat myself up !!!Onwards and upwards. Berni

  4. You are right, there’s never a good time, I started on Saturday night and I’m feeling so fresh this Monday.
    Thanks for the inspiration Kate

  5. It is true… we need to make the change now, even if we have dips. No more excuses. Sabotage is only sabotage if you let it control the next action.

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