Kate's Blog

You Aren’t Weak, Broken Or Lacking Willpower

Many people mistakenly believe that sobriety is just about having tons of willpower.

Maybe you’re convinced that if you were stronger, you’d be able to ‘control’ alcohol a bit better.
Perhaps you’ve confided in someone about your drinking, only for them to turn round and say, “Well – why don’t you just stop at one?” 
This stuff can leave you feeling as if your drinking is a personal failing and weakness. 
I get it. It’s a horrible place to be. 
But you aren’t weak at all. I explain why in this video:

Key points:

You’re not weak

If you’re reading this, I’d put money on the fact that you are smart, motivated and driven. You’re juggling many competing demands, between family life, work and the fallout from the coronavirus.
You have to be a strong person to make all that stuff happen whilst feeling hungover and pretending everything’s absolutely fine. 
 

The real problem

Alcohol is a mind-altering, addictive drug which is normalised, glamorised and often presented as the solution to all your problems, and completely essential to a full and happy life. 
It’s completely normal – and predictable – to become dependent on an addictive drug that is repeatedly presented to you in the most flattering and appealing way.
 

Successful sobriety isn’t about willpower

Let’s be clear: grit and determination will only get you so far. Long term, happy sobriety is about much more than willpower – it’s about doing the right mindset work.
If you want sobriety to feel less like a punishing diet and more like an empowering way of life, you have to examine the benefits of drinking. Is alcohol genuinely providing everything you think it is? (Hint: it’s not).
 

Why do you really drink?

The real work of sobriety is looking at why you want to numb out in the first place. Why do you want to escape your life so often? 
Examining this is much more helpful than clinging on to a story (and it is just a story) that you are weak or broken and there’s something wrong with you.
 
If you’d love some help and support to quit drinking, click here for details of my online course.
 

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