Before I quit drinking, I struggled to picture what life would be like without booze in it.
I just couldn’t imagine coping with a bad day at work without wine.
How would I go out at the weekend or celebrate something special without a glass of something fizzy?
Because I couldn’t picture these things, they felt impossible. So then I’d wonder, what’s the point in even trying to quit?
If your mind is getting stuck in a similar thought loop right now, this video will help you untangle it all.
Key points
It’s ok if you can’t imagine life sober
I get so many emails from women who cannot picture life without alcohol. And because they can’t imagine it, they think they won’t be able to do it. But the problem is that if you wait until you can picture it all really clearly, you might be waiting forever. That day may never come.
The secret is to find a way in which you can take action comfortably – without being able to picture all this stuff and without having it all figured out. What if you moved forward anyway? That is possible for you. Here are three tips to help.
Tip 1: What else did you struggle to imagine at one point?
Perhaps there was a time when you couldn’t see yourself in the role you’re in now. Maybe that’s as a mum, a grandma, a position at work, or maybe you completely switched careers. Perhaps you’re a runner or a yogi, and at one point you’d have laughed to imagine that! Maybe you’ve lost loads of weight, and there was a time when you could never imagine yourself in a thinner body. Your life will be full of things that at one point or another seemed unthinkable, but you now take for granted.
Tip 2: Seek out women who’ve already quit drinking
Find like-minded women who are already sober and doing this thing that feels hard to picture. Find out what their lives are like and use that as inspiration to know that you can do it too. Go to my Success Stories page and watch the videos. Look for the things you have in common with these women. Remember: if these women can do it, then it’s all the more evidence that change is possible and you can do it too.
Tip 3: Collect data without thinking too far ahead
This is the taking action part of it all. Because truthfully, you’ll be able to imagine so much more if you just go and do stuff. Hold it lightly and take small steps. Remember, you’re not making a lifetime decision here or signing a contract. You’re just experimenting. If you were a scientist, how much data would you want to gather before drawing a conclusion? Let yourself collect experiences and information in the least scary way: by committing to taking a break from booze.
If you’d love some help and support to take a proper break from booze, click here for details of my online course.
14 responses
Thank you for the email,
Perfect timing as usually by now the G@T would me out, but because I found you yesterday after a boozy Saturday that was a disaster, I am now on day two.
Can’t wait to start your course, but until then I will continue with your FB page.
Just off for a bike ride
Thank you x
You’re very welcome Jo. 🙂 A bike ride sounds a much nicer way to spend an afternoon…
Right there with you! I, too, had a disastrous, boozy Saturday (after a disastrous, boozy Friday night!) and am once again on day two. Wish I would’ve enrolled in Kate’s course that started in July and looking forward to start the fall session. Take good care!
This time last year I really couldn’t imagine not drinking.
Now after completing the course in The January induction, I can’t imagine ever drinking again. 34 weeks since my last drink. Kate gave me the tools and all the girls in GU course kept me going forward. I now have a totally new life.
So pleased you can’t imagine alcohol in your life Jackie; that’s true freedom. I might have provided the tools, but you put in the work. Many congratulations on a totally new life. ❤️
Thanks for sharing, Jackie. I appreciate the success stories on Kate’s site and hearing from others like you.
Excellent insights as usual, Kate. I definitely suffer from the “I can’t imagine doing this” mindset. But why? I could never imagine being a mother, and here I am now with five fantastic young adult sons. I could never imagine running 26.2 miles, but I started with baby steps, trained, and have completed five of marathons! And, okay, at this point I can’t imagine doing another, lol, but I’m sure I could if I set my mind to it. And yet I use “I can’t imagine it” as a means to talk myself out of sobriety.
You have the evidence Colleen that you can do unimaginable things, so why not give alcohol free living a go? I’ll never ask you to quit forever, just join me for a six week break and let me show you how good it can be! https://thesoberschool.com/course/
Had sad news on Friday which made me realise life is very short, so I’m now on evening 4 of no wine , for now the FB page is helping and your emails thank you x
Well done on choosing a better alcohol-free life for yourself. It can be a lonely journey when you’re doing this on your own. If you need some support, my online coaching programme would be a great fit for you. Here are the details: https://thesoberschool.com/course/
I discovered you 2 weeks ago and have lived two weeks without alcohol – until last night! I woke up on the sofa this morning with my heart beating out of my chest and feeling awful! This morning”s experience really was sobering. I’ve done so many things in my life that I couldn’t ever imagine achieving, the last fortnight has given me a glimpse of life to come. With baby steps and your support and advice, I’m sure I can do this. Thank you
Putting the glass down is the first step, educating yourself about alcohol and changing your mindset is the way to make sobriety stick. That’s exactly what I teach at The Sober School. It is possible to change, just see what can be achieved with inspiration from some past students of mine: https://thesoberschool.com/success-stories/
This really resonates with me. I have tried several times to stop & have done as long as 3 months AF .
As soon as a holiday or celebration event comes along I seem to give in & drink. Then it’s a long while before I end up taking another break off drinking. I only drink at weekends but always drink way too much. I need to work on shifting my beliefs that I can do holidays & celebrations without alcohol.
You’re not alone Lisa and it’s the mindset that needs to change and that’s exactly what I teach at The Sober School. This is the piece that’s missing for many women, so come join my next Getting Unstuck course because that’s exactly what it does, gets you ‘unstuck’ from the same cycle: https://thesoberschool.com/course/