Just imagine how good you could feel by November 1st if you treated yourself to a Sober October.
If you’ve been delaying taking a break from booze or putting off doing “something” about your drinking, now is a great time to take action.
If you want to smash Sober October and feel great throughout the month, you’re going to need to approach it with the right mindset…
And that’s exactly what I’m going to help you with today…
Key points:
Stay engaged with why you’re doing Sober October
Your brain is lazy and forgetful – it likes to think the same things over and over because that’s easy and efficient. So don’t leave your brain unsupervised and hope that it will just magically stop generating thoughts like, “You deserve a glass of wine!” – because it won’t.
Direct your brain to things that are going to serve you better. A great way to do this is to put a daily reminder on your phone to write about your reasons for doing Sober October. Journal about what you love about alcohol-free living. Let’s put your focus on things that are actually useful to think about!
Challenge some of your beliefs
Unless you’re happy feeling deprived and miserable for a month, you’re going to want to question some of the stories you have about alcohol and what you believe it does. On a piece of paper, write down all the so-called benefits on one side of the page. Title this, “Things I think alcohol does for me.”
Next, draw a line down the page and create another column called “Evidence this belief might not be true”. So for example, if you’re convinced that wine helps to make date night more special, then in that evidence column, you want to reflect on those times when drinking backfired on you. I bet you find more examples than you expect.
Add stuff in
A big mistake I see people make during Sober October is that they focus just on what’s gone. Their whole month is about the fact that alcohol isn’t there. Rather than spending the month mourning what isn’t there, I recommend you use this opportunity to add stuff in. What would you love to treat yourself to?
Maybe it’s going to the movies mid-week. Or that yoga class you never normally get round to. Or reading that book that’s been on your bedside table for months. Or getting your nails done. What are the things you often think about doing, but don’t ever get round to when you’re drinking (or don’t think you deserve?)
44 responses
I am doing it this year ! Thanks for the tips x
You’re very welcome and good luck on this fabulous journey of self discovery. 🙂
Hi Kate I’m actually doing your course at the moment so WILL be sober in October ( at least until 27th)!
Regards
Mala/Marie-Louise Smelt.
Sober October here you come…and beyond 🙂
I’ve done your course previously and it’s good to be reminded of some of the elements in the toolkit. Thank you!
You are fantastic and I am so grateful. All the best from Linda
That’s me just completed four weeks sober and I definitely want to continue throughout October, my clothes feel less tight and I’m enjoying the break for many reasons, I’m curious to see what another sober month will bring me
Many congratulations on four weeks Linda! Approaching your sober experience from a place of curiosity is a brilliant strategy. Keep gathering evidence of the lifestyle enhancements and you won’t be disappointed.
I am possibly having to face surgery in October, so I think if I can remove alcohol from my life this will benefit me in every way. At present, I can’t see anything positive in drinking apart from it relieves some of my anxiety.
Absolutely Jan, removing alcohol from your body gives it the best chance for a speedy recovery. Best of luck with the surgery. All alcohol can give you is a hangover. It postpones anxiety, then multiplies it!
How true about the anxiety!!
I’m doing Sober October . Started early 10 days ago . Never managed it before . Fingers crossed I can this time as really want to . Thanks for the tips xx
Excellent start to Sober October Elaine and you CAN do it. Have a listen to my free pep talk if you’re struggling; it will provide the inspiration you need to keep going: https://thesoberschool.com/pep-talk
Very interesting pep talk and I soooo agree with everything you have said. I’m actually an alcoholic and unfortunately I have had many rock bottoms and rehabs. I’ve also had huge periods of sobriety and I felt great but that first drink as Kate says is lethal. I’ve been struggling for years. And the amount of bad mistakes and carnage I’ve caused is a book to be read. The stigma needs to go I believe. To me it’s the most evil and dangerous drug on the planet and the only drug you feel you have to justify not taking.
I am 30 days sober today after a relapse on holiday
AA doesn’t work well for me either Kate although I’m going to a meeting tonight. I do pop in and out for a tonic ….. no pun intended 🙂 But thank you so much for your recording. It’s given me a lift already and am happy to have found this website. Sober October is a definite for me A life without Alcohol is a definite for me but it’s so hard and I’m seeking everything I can to ensure I remain sober
I wish everyone the best and thanks again Kate.
Regards
Kerry Xx
30 days sober is amazing, well done Kerry, the hardest days are done. AA isn’t for everyone and my method of learning your way out of alcohol misuse is an entirely different approach. Don’t just take my word for it, have a listen to some of my inspiring students talk about their experience of my online coaching programme, called Getting Unstuck; https://thesoberschool.com/success-stories/
I’m also doing your course at the moment! Thanks for the tips! Really helpful.
Im joining!
I’m going to do this.
Thanks Kate …… did your course in Jan …. been AF free since. It is doable but the mindset taught by you is key! Don’t even think about it now which is unbelievable but true. Sober everyday is the only way to go.
So good to hear that you remain alcohol-free Kris, such a lifestyle upgrade you’ve given yourself! Mindset and community are the powerful foundations upon which to construct a fulfilling, genuine, and joyful life. ❤️
Just finished four weeks of sobriety and am feeling better in so many ways, and am keen to go sober in October for the first time . I thought AA was the only answer to my heaving drinking until I came across your Instagram posts. Thank you for giving me the courage and inspiration to start on this alcohol free journey.
That’s awesome Erica, four weeks and going strong! My approach significantly differs from AA, and I’ve written a blog post about it that I believe will resonate with you: https://thesoberschool.com/an-alternative-to-aa-why-my-approach-is-different/
Hi Kate I’ve not had a drink since 29th July, I’m doing your course at the moment and I am really starting to find myself again, I find reading the comments a great help it’s good to know there are people who have been on the same road as myself, I don’t feel as alone now, I know this is only the start of my journey but with your guidance and this wonderful group I’ll get there, so thank you Kate and the ladies xx
Rediscovering oneself is a significant aspect of shedding the blinkers of alcohol. I am honoured to guide you on a journey towards self-awareness Joan. ❤️
Sober October for Macmillan fundraiser as my best friend died in August. She inspired me to stop smoking and I have managed for 6 months since her diagnosis. Now to stop all the wine so that I can be as healthy as I can, as she didn’t have the chance to.
Really inspiring introduction from Sober School, although I haven’t done the course. Great tips in this email, thanks, Kate.
Wishing you the best, Amanda! Taking a break from alcohol can be incredibly beneficial for both your physical and mental health. If you’d like to know more about my online coaching programme, called Getting Unstuck, here are the details: https://thesoberschool.com/course/
Hi Kate – I’ve started soberoctober already. I’ve been reading your advice and watching your clips that I have and am in a great frame of mind. I’m not losing out, I’m winning life. Thank you so much. Joanne
I love that Joanne, winning life! Sobriety is not about giving something up, it’s about taking everything back. ❤️
I’m going to do sober October. Thank you very much for your tips
I started 4 days ago and ready to move into Sober October! I signed up at the gym for a 30 day challenge that also includes no alcohol so this will be a good motivator also. Since reading and listening to you I have cut down. 10 days of no drinking in September (with a two week holiday break) That may not sound like a great track record but before last year, I don’t remember when I had a day free of alcohol. Now, most months I am 1 out of 3 days free of alcohol which is is better than none, I guess. But, when I do drink it is too many. so that is the downside. I need a long period to clear my head and get it on track. I would have joined your class but I was away on vacation and didn’t want to start quitting while on it. But, coming home I am ready for a break. I’m interested to see my gym challenge and sober October combined and what I’ll feel like in November. It is scary to think about never again, but I can say that 6 weeks is doable and I will keep my curiosity peaked for the rewards you talk about. thank you.
Good for you Mo! Making changes, such as taking a six-week break from alcohol, will allow you to start feeling the benefits. Concentrate on the month ahead; the idea of never drinking again may be daunting, as the mind struggles to comprehend ‘forever’. Doable short term goals with lots of rewards and celebration along the way will cement your choices. Best of luck. 🙂
I am going to try
I’m in!!
I’m going to try. I decided this today. I have a birthday meal to go to this evening. I just know my friend will complain about me driving!!
Further more, my reasons are:
I used to love reading and I never do anymore.
I used to love running, but never do anymore
I sick and tired of feeling sick and tired!!
I want to be a better parent to my grown up sons.
I want to stop wasting money
I want to take better care of myself. I want to lose weight (I’m the heaviest I’ve ever been!)
The list goes on….
All are compelling reasons Zoe, and achievable by quitting just one thing: alcohol. Do this for your own benefit, not to satisfy or appease others. It’s your body, your life, and you have every right to feel wonderful. 🙂
I am DOING Sober October for myself!
I know it will be a challenge
I want ME to shine
I’ve been drinking for 3 yrs and I’ve stopped here and there. I was stopping for others and not for ME
I have been aware of the time of day when I start, so I will need to be mindful of this
Plus, I am ashamed of drinking has done to my body,
Bravo Nancy, doing it for yourself! If you need a dose of motivation at that tricky time of day, check out my free wine o’clock guide to keep you on course. https://thesoberschool.com/wineoclock
I stopped drinking on January 1st for 100 days. I’m happy to say that, with the help of your video clips and tips, I am now starting my tenth month alcohol free. I drank because I was sad and lonely. I now realize that drinking doesn’t make things better, only a great deal worse. Thank you
I’m getting on great thank you for all your support.
That’s fantastic, lovely to hear from you.
I’m doing Sober October! I’m a 1 to2 drink a week person who just wants to take a break and possibly continue on from there! I feel awesome when I don’t drink. I love hearing your soothing voice Kate and the beautiful garden in the background! I’m from the US and love your way of speaking!
I’m over half way through sober October, but am already thinking about just getting through the month then I can have some wine again. I don’t want to go back to drinking but don’t know how to get beyond the October challenge. It’s all about October right now and nothing beyond that. My partner has said just to drink on weekend nights and to stick to a certain amount and not drink more than that….but I have tried moderation many times and it always becomes “oh I know it’s only Monday and I’m not supposed to drink but I’ve had a hard day”, or something similar. I also have a holiday planned and to me a holiday and drinking wine go hand in hand. Do you have any advice on how to overcome these challenges Kate?
Hi Deb, You get to choose exactly what you want to do next. I did this blog about Dry January I think you’ll find it helpful: https://thesoberschool.com/dry-january-nearly-over/