Kate's Blog

Alcohol Doesn’t Really Work – Why You Deserve Better

Imagine buying something that you thought was going to make you feel less stressed, only to discover that it didn’t really work.

Perhaps it distracted you for an hour or two, but then it woke you up in the early hours. And the next day you felt even more stressed – life seemed harder, not easier.

Would you go back to the shop and ask for your money back? Today’s blog video is all about the fact that alcohol doesn’t *really* work…

Key points

It works just enough to keep you chasing it, but it doesn’t really work. You get the crumbs of something – a brief distraction from whatever you’re avoiding – but that’s about it. Alcohol doesn’t really do the thing you’re looking for it to do.

For example – when you’ve had a stressful day, alcohol seems to help a bit at first. It seems to relieve that stress for half an hour, maybe an hour or so. But then the next day that same stress is still there. In fact, now it seems worse because you’re hungover, tired and less resilient.

Imagine you bought a product from a shop that claimed to relieve your anxiety. You tried it and found it worked very briefly, but the next morning your anxiety was worse! So much worse. Would you take the product back?

What if your doctor prescribed you something to ease your stress and you found the same thing? It kind of worked for a short time, but then your sleep was disrupted and the next day everything felt worse. Given the cancer risks of continuing to use the drug, would you keep going? Or ask for something else?

Here’s my invitation for you: over the next few days and weeks, notice when alcohol is not working. Most of us tend to romanticise alcohol and talk it up… but I want you to do the opposite. Notice when you’re getting the opposite of what you asked for and the opposite of what you ordered!

Hi, I'm Kate

I founded The Sober School to show you there’s another way out of your shame that doesn’t involve AA or rehab. 


21 Responses

  1. Hi Kate
    Just wanted to say thanks for all your blogs. Totally agree with this all alcohol did for me was make me feel rubbish after the first initial hit. I have been alcohol free for 18 months now and will never drink again not because I can’t but I just don’t want to. You are an inspiration x

    1. You’re very welcome Yvonne, so glad the blogs inspire you. 🙂 Congratulations on 18 months alcohol-free. Alcohol is nothing but a crude, toxic substance that adds nothing to our quality of life. Wishing you a happy and sober festive season!

  2. It’s been 7 weeks booze free after 55 years of using booze as a prop! Until my husband died 18 months ago and the booze just made my sadness tenfold so I have quit. Hopefully for good and your bloggs Kate have definitely inspired me and given me the strength to see the light! Thank you Kate

  3. Hi Kate – with heartfelt thanks to you I have finally gone alcohol free for good! . I have been following your blogs for nearly 2 years
    -but continued to try and moderate the alcohol I drank, & did dry January & Sober for October . I finally realised however that the only way to be fully in control of my life was to quit alcohol completely. It feels great. I’m following your Xmas calendar – to give me extra support over this festive period. Thanks once again x

    1. Well done Elizabeth, the only way to find out if something works is to give it a try. Nobody ever regrets NOT drinking! Moderation is a myth and you’ve proved that to yourself. Keep going, it gets better and better. 🙂

      1. No body every regrets not drinking. I think I need that on one of those cutesy signs, instead of live, laugh, love! Thx

  4. I know Christmas is maybe not a good time to go alcohol free, but after absolutely wasting a weekend, feeling rotten, feeling depressed and having awful palpitations, I decided enough is enough!!
    I have been shopping and instead of buying booze, I’ve bought some lovely Fevertree flavoured tonics and soda waters. The blood orange ones are particularly nice.
    When I thought my heart was never going to stop jumping about, I prayed to God that I would stop drinking I was that frightened.
    I just hope I can keep my promise.

    1. Hi Julie, there really is no such thing as the ‘right time’ to quit drinking, there will always be something coming up in the diary. Now sounds like a good time for you though and I love the plans you are making. I am also running a free Masterclass soon, I think you will find it very helpful. You can register for it here https://thesoberschool.com/masterclass.

    2. Hi Julie! I quit drinking Dec. 1, 2019. I said the same thing you did, “This is a really stupid time to try to quit drinking.” But I had tried so many other months, trying to squeeze it in between celebrations. I figured if I could quit during the holidays, I could do it anytime. The secret was I really wanted to. To keep me committed, I took Kate’s course in January 2020, and I’ve stayed alcohol-free for more than 4 years now. Kate’s right: There’s never a perfect time. Just like there’s never a perfect time to have a baby, buy a house, start a new job, dump that terrible partner, any of the big life changes. There is only just THE time. Good luck! I promise, it’ll be better than you ever thought.

  5. Following a recent scan on my liver as I have a benign liver growth. My liver is fatty. I feel inspired by these ladies. I’m also on Tamoxifen for secondary breast which can contribute to fatty liver.
    In the new year I want to abstein from alcohol to improve my health and lethargy. Looking forward to joing the new year with lots of inspirations.

    1. Hi Jane, I am sorry to hear of your health issues but I can’t deny I am glad you have been inspired to change your relationship with alcohol. It can be a lonely journey when you’re doing this on your own. If you need any more support, my free Masterclass would be a great fit for you. Here is the link to register https://thesoberschool.com/masterclass

  6. Hi Kate I reading all your blogs and understand how alcohol damaging your life.I never drink for plesure ,I drink and wanna cry and I can’t explain why.Totaly feeding myself of wine,feeling ill,then skiping the work days,no eating or cooking feeling ill.Mostly Im thinking why Im doing it to myself?I feel something missing in my life happiness gone,no motivations,getting older, fears about future.Just look at the kids and thinking they not deserve mum like this.They think I’m mad a bit,couple weeks goes nice with no drink then Im in to everything 100% and getting sleepless nights of fixing or finishing everything, then the alcohol comes in my mind ,at least I will sleep a bit,but unlikely it last long and then the same getting sober after one week untill next relapse..Do I have cognitive behaviour?Or I realy need to see psychologist?Im really wanna quit drinkig and I don’t want demage my health,or feel guilty for a rest of my life of not saving money,yes I calculate and was in a shock the money went on alcohol a lot.I’m busy,very creative, my work is cleaner,but I do some other things sewing,upholstery, ceramic loads of interesting things in my head.But still not understand why that bad day comes and ruins everything and how to avoid temptation or those hours ?

    1. Hi Sandra. You wrote exactly what I feel. I stayed with my elderly mum for a few days over Christmas and got drunk last night and fell and she had to help me up, she rang my sister crying as she was so worried about me. My sister has cameras in mums hallway and she sent me the video of me lying there and mum in tears trying to help me. I think this is the kick I need to stop. Mum has early stages of dementia and I’m disgusted with myself. I have signed up for the masterclass and hope I can get the help I need. Good luck to you too.

  7. Thank you so much for you. You are a gift and I so appreciate you. You have been my support these last nine months since I stopped drinking Easter Sunday. Whereas I have an occasional drink since then, I come back to you and your messages and I am always reaffirmed that not drinking is the only choice. It really doesn’t work – how wise your words for this holiday season. Thank you, Kate.

      1. Thank you. I will check it out. My preference is to stop drinking for good and to be influenced at all by others.

  8. Hi!
    I sometimes fool myself into drinking because something about that day has been hard and it’s a switch-off, but I always end up disappointed in myself for caving when I’m not ignorant to the facts of alcohol.
    I drink out of habit and I think something in me thinks I’ll be bored and uncomfortable if I don’t drink.
    Last night I went to bed at 22:30 and had a 4.5 hour panic attack. It was truly horrible. I need this to be the point I leave alcohol behind me.

    1. Hi Lisa, taking a break from alcohol will allow you to see how much better your life can be without it. I can help you do that if you would like some support.

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