Feeling Grateful: Because I Was Sober Today…

Feeling Grateful: Because I Was Sober Today…

My American friends will be celebrating Thanksgiving later this week.

It got me thinking about gratitude and the important role it plays in sobriety.

Alcohol-free living is a mindset game, and it makes such a difference when your focus is on what’s going well

We all tend to have a negativity bias, and when we’re working on something challenging (like quitting drinking) it’s easy to focus on what’s not going so great.

If you know you have a tendency to overlook the positives (I’m definitely guilty of this 🙋‍♀️) then keep reading!

No matter where you are on your alcohol-free journey, I’d like you to finish this sentence:

 

“Because I was sober today…”

 

I asked the students on my Getting Unstuck course to answer this same question. They had some lovely answers:

Because I was sober today…

“… I had the patience to read to my kids at bedtime without thinking about my glass of wine downstairs.” Marianne

“… I went to the gym without that sick feeling.” Rosaleen

“… I meditated in the morning and then went to a SoulCycle class.” Michele

“… I got out of the house with the boys on time to get them to the childminders and nursery. And I spontaneously did a good deed for a friend before 9am.” Ellie

“… I absolutely know that any feelings I have are true and genuine, and have nothing to do with underlying guilt, shame and anger about drinking.” Ally

“… I woke early and had coffee in bed with my husband as we chatted.” Linda

“… I was able to truly enjoy the company of my grandchildren.” Debra

“… I got through a massive day at work where my boss flew in to test us all. I stood up to him, clear-headed and bright eyed instead of trying to avoid him.” Clare

 

Now it’s your turn… 

In the comments below, finish the sentence, “Because I was sober today…”

It doesn’t matter whether you’re on Day 1 or Day 1000. I know sobriety will be making a difference to your life, and I’d love to hear about it. Let me know below👇

 

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106 Comments

  1. Because I was sober today, I woke up feeling refreshed after a great weekend and now I’m ready to attack the week! I’m a proud graduate of your January class and the novelty of sobriety has not worn off yet! I’m feeling so good these days.

    Reply
    • This is great to hear. Congratulations Linda – you’ll soon be celebrating one year AF! ❤️

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      • Day one for me yesterday half way through day 2 and struggling a bit!

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        • Hello Sandie I would like to keep in touch I am on Day 1

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        • Because I was sober today, I got myself up and out to work. Ive been really struggling lately and drinking far more than I should be, here’s hoping I can get through this. Day 1 complete x

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    • First day sober and l realise what damage l am doing to myself and my family and what a dark place l have been in due to past hurt. Well no more dark places for me. Day by day l will see clearer as a sober person and not hide behind a wine glass

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      • Hi Pam, I am on day 2 of being sober. I have been going through a bad break up from a toxic relationship all while living in a city with no family here. I have alot of emotional problems and I work full time while pursuing my MBA. I really need all the support I can get. I’m in a dark place as well. It’s like a cave with no light at the end of the tunnel. God please stay with us all!

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        • By removing the alcohol you will remove the dark place in time. Each day gets better. Do not do too much and please take care of you each day. God believes you are important – you are! Keep it up and the darkness will get lifted.

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        • Hi Tamaka
          Being in a dark place and turning to drink can also be very lonely. As you say Kay removing the alcohol will help remove the dark place. It’s already reassuring and helps knowing that l am not alone.

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        • Hi Taneka
          Well Done! You are facing these challenges so courageously, taking them all on at once. Have faith in yourself beautiful one, you’re clearing out the garbage and will be creating a place of purity for your own growth. I admire you so much, well done. Frankie x

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      • Because I have been sober for 8 months today (!) I am feeling so good and got alot accomplished today. I am truly thankful for so many things. My mind is clearer and stronger. I took the April class (1st day AF was 3/25/19). I am thankful for Kate and her school! It made all the difference in the world. Yay to AF!! NO desires for the ethanol either!!

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        • Thanks Kay! So happy to hear about your 8 months. Well done ❤️

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    • I’m ill for the 2nd day in a row because I drank 2 Old Fashioned cocktails Saturday night. I’m 72 years old- you’d think I was done with this foolishness! Feel horrible and ashamed.

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      • I’m sorry to hear that Judith. If you’d like some help and support to quit drinking (and make sobriety stick) I’d be happy to help. Here’s some more information about my online course: https://thesoberschool.com/course/

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        • Because I was sober today, I woke up relaxed and full of energy to focus on my work

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      • Hey Judith I can understand your pain. Please keep moving forward and reaching out whenever you need to. One of my biggest problems is that I never reach out when I need to. Blessings to you.

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      • Thank you for sharing, Judith. Good for you in being honest. Keep looking forward. Hugs to you.

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    • Wow! Allys response really resonated with me! Because I was sober today the dog’s came into the bedroom for cuddles and I didn’t roll over and cover my head. I cooked mango sorbet, lemon tarts and gingerbread plus dinner!

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    • Because I was sober, I slept 10 hours last night! I can’t ever remember doing that. I woke up refreshed, then I cleaned our flower beds, getting ready for Thanksgiving, and then took a nap. I am on day 57, taking the entire week off from work, and taking care of myself

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    • Congratulations Linda! I am right behind you at 8 months today!

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    • Because I was sober today,
      I feel great every morning.
      I’m so much more connected to my family and friends, and loving life AF..

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    • Because I was sober today , I resisted being drawn into an old much repeated argument because I reacted logically , not emotionally .

      Reply
  2. I am realistic about the damage alcohol has done to me and the damage I’ve done to others. I see me for me, and I am starting to see a path forward to health and happiness.

    Reply
    • It sounds as if you’re moving in the right direction Ann. Keep going Ann, step by step 🙂

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    • I have been good for a few years now not a daily drinker but would binge for 2 to 3 days every few months. Now it’s happening again with more frequency.. I’m feeling lost and unsure.. I am damaged.. That easy path to stress relief is embedded. How do I get rid of it?

      Reply
      • I’d be happy to show you how Nadia. A lot of people mistakenly feel that alcohol helps them cope with stress (when scientific studies show us the opposite is true!) If you need some support to start feeling happier and break free of the cycle you’re in, here’s how we can work together: https://thesoberschool.com/course/

        Reply
  3. I feel good today because I remembered going to bed and eating dinner. I dont feel guilty because I’ve left my family down once again.

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    • It’s horrible when you can’t remember the night before, right? I think nearly all of us here will have been there, done that. It’s so good to wake up remembering everything!

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      • I woke up without a headache n am fresh, clear n alert at work today! My 1st goal is to make it all week without a drink! Steff

        Reply
        • Good luck Steff! If you need any more support to make sobriety stick, my online course will be a big help. Here are some more details: https://thesoberschool.com/course/

          Reply
      • Hi, I’m
        New to this. Well not the trying to stop drinking!! my dad passed away and I started drinking very heavily. A functioning alcoholic. Nobody knew. Then it got out of control. I willingly went to rehab for 8 weeks. Came out a different person. I was sober for 3 years. Then kids came along! 5,4 and 2!! Close in age but had my last one st 40!! So couldn’t hang around!!! Lol
        The pressures of motherhood/ life in general etc/ no time out, I started to have a couple of beers once the hubby was home to take over. Soon enough it was a bottle of wine/ hiding drink. Totally out of control again, but still up doing lunches/ school runs etc. Felt like a Ferris wheel and so needed off/ tired of the same cycle every day. I plucked up the courage again and went to my doctors. She gave me Liberian ,(only for 5 days) as I was scared of the sweats/ shakes etc.
        Finally….. ( I’ve gone on a tad to much) lol !!! I haven’t had a drink in 2.5 weeks, I feel so much better , jokey mummy is back. I know it’s a day at a time even an hr at a time if under p! When I feel my head going I take the pub out for a massive walk and I come back a different person . Xo Gillian

        Reply
  4. I was able to be present and not be ‘fuzzy’ about things I did or was told. I also did a lovely yoga class. I’m nearly 11 months sober (January graduate). The thought of drinking again makes me feel ill at ease.

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    • 11 months already! That’s brilliant Fiona. I look forward to seeing you celebrate one year sober soon. What a way to start 2020 ❤️

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  5. Because I was sober today…I enjoyed every minute of shopping for a quiet, sober, lovely Christmas, catch up over coffee with a friend, walking in the winter sunshine and eating well. The little things are the big things

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    • Amen! The little things make ALL the difference. Sounds like a lovely day 🙂

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    • Because I was sober today I was able to have genuine, sincere focus on relationships and not be worrying about chasing after that next high.

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  6. I have dreams that I can remember and I wake up refreshed

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    • Hangover-free mornings never get old! They are the best 🙂

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  7. Because I was sober today I celebrated 57 AF days with my husband this morning! We went over to our daughters for dinner last night and had a great time with family and I wasn’t tempted by their drinking although I must say they all seem to drink less. Our daughter doesn’t drink! It’s a wonderful feeling!

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    • Congratulations on your 57 days Mary! Wishing you many more alcohol free days ahead! 🙂

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  8. Managing to cook tea and not saying when hubby comes in I can’t be bothered to cook ☺️

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    • I can definitely relate to that. Nice one Dianne! 🙂

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  9. Because I was sober today, I woke up early and enjoyed a brisk walk with my dog before work.

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    • Because I was sober today I managed to cope through a really busy stressful day and still have the energy for my kids this evening

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    • Brilliant. What a way to start Monday morning!

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      • Because I was sober today I got up at 5 AM fresh and excited to have my coffee!
        I went to 6AM yoga then I went to 7:30 AM daily Mass, got to my office by 8:30 feeling grateful
        Linda

        Reply
  10. Because I was sober today I could take my grandchildren to school without worrying about having a hangover. I can be on call at anytime when I’m needed by my family.I can wake up and go out without thinking how many drinks did I have and am I ok to drive. Thanks Kate for showing me a new lifestyle.

    Reply
    • This is so powerful Lilian. Knowing that you can be there for the people you care about – at any time of day or night – is huge. Congratulations on your sobriety ❤️

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  11. Because I was sober today, I went to work feeling refreshed from a good night’s sleep and ready to do a good job.

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    • Awesome. Have a great week Mary! Life is so much easier hangover-free 🙂

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  12. Because I was sober today I made it to 28 days AF and just love planning to run a 10 mile race in 28 days time.

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    • Love this! Congratulations on your 28 days Frankie and I hope your race goes well!

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  13. Because I was sober today I’ve enjoyed an early tea, a nice relaxing bath and looking forward to an early night with my book after a long day at work.

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    • I love simple, quiet nights in like that. Sounds perfect 🙂

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  14. Because I was sober today I got in from work, organised my two boys and their social diaries, did the food shop and kept calm … all without needing to lie in my bed for an hour.

    Reply
    • You have to juggle so many different things as a mum. Congratulations on your sobriety Claire! 🙂

      Reply
      • Thankyou. Only 9 days so it’s all very new. Feeling positive and good though

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        • I said this to my daughter on Sunday.. We actually said it to each other. Because I am sober today I am able able to be with and support my daughter while shes her 8 month old daughter/my granddaughter to hospital. Providing words of comfort when told the baby needed an xray and generally keeping calm and listening. After being told all is OK & just a bit of penecillin required we both said… Thank goodness we hadn’t been drinking. And do you know I never once thought “I need a drink”.. Amazing! And that’s because Kates course helped me to give up alcohol and understand how to live happily without it. Today I am 964 days AF and forever grateful to The Sober School.

          Reply
  15. Because I was sober today and the past 21 days, I got 101 little jobs done and it’s a Monday. My usual Monday’s and Tuesday’s were spent recovering from the weekend binge. Oh how I love this feeling.

    Reply
    • It’s a much better way to start the week, right? Well done on your 21 days Kathryn!

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  16. I have just eaten dinner with my husband and we actually had a conversation. That’s not happened in a while!

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    • That is great to hear! 🙂

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  17. Because I am sober today I had a realisation that I am not feeling the latent anger I have become so accustomed to. It’s been 11 days and every day since I made the decision have woken up feeling relieved and happy. Tonight I have stayed calm in the face of my kids pushing boundaries. I actually see how me regulating my emotions allows them to do the same. These things I know but to actually see it happening is remarkable. New revelations every day.

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    • Yesssss…. what a big realisation to have, Rebecca. This is so important. Well done on your 11 days too 🙂

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  18. I didn’t get much sleep but I still feel confident about my work-day ahead.

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    • Being sober and tired is nothing like being hungover and tired, that’s for sure!

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  19. Because I am sober today I dealt with a situation with calmness and clarity, instead of losing my head and grabbing a bottle on the way home. My drinking always made the problems worse. My work life has changed immeasurably

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    • Absolutely! Drinking always made the problems worse… that was my experience too. Here’s to having a clear head and calmness instead
      🙂

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  20. Because I am sober today.. I went to work feeling clear-headed, able to manage large groups of teens, was able to smile and laugh easily, and feel relatively unfrazzled by the end of the day. Because I am sober, I have more money, and bought Nat’l Geographic Live tickets, going to see a mountaineer speak tonight and feel inspired. Because I am sober today.. I interact with beautiful sober people online. : )

    Reply
    • Sounds like a good day – and you took it all in your stride! 🙂

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  21. I enjoyed the first Monday in a long time. Ran in the morning before work and then was really productive at work !

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    • Hurrah! That is great to hear. What a way to start the week 🙂

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  22. Because I was sober today, I had a good night sleep for the first time in a long time.
    I am clear headed and do not have anxiety swirling around in my head.

    Reply
    • The sleep deprivation that comes with drinking is such a killer. I”m pleased to hear you had a good night’s sleep at last!

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  23. Because I am sober today…I was able to get all of my errands done on one day off and making a pot of homemade chili to enjoy with my sweetie, rather than spending the day off sleeping like I used to when I was drinking.

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    • I hear you! Last Thursday was a non working day and my first sober. I actually got out of bed before 11 (I’m ashamed to say that – though there have been days where I got up just before kids came home from school!), in fact it was 8am. I accomplished so much including seeing friends. What a great reward for staying off alcohol.
      Well done
      Claire x

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    • Yum. This sounds delicious!

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  24. Because I was sober today I was able to be present for everything that happened today, the good, the bad and the ugly!

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    • That’s brilliant Vanessa. Here’s to being fully present for our one and only life 🙂

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  25. Because I am sober I had a wonderful nights sleep and got up early and went outrigger canoeing which was sprint training with no problems. I am not angry and agitated

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    • Sounds like an exciting morning Angela. So much better than being hungover and lethargic!

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  26. Because I’ve been sober since attending your class in July, yep, little old me, 5 months in, not a drop, and every word you said,every promise of a better me, you were right.

    Thank you Kate xx

    :0) xx

    Reply
    • Gill – your comment made me so happy, I’m delighted to hear this. Congratulations on your 5 months! ❤️

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  27. I got up early on a Monday morning for an 08.30am hospital appointment. 🙂 This would never have happened – I would of cancelled it had i been still drinking.

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    • Hangover-free mornings are so much easier, right?! 🙂

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      • I woke up early before the kids woke and did 15min morning meditation and a yoga class after a I dropped the kids to school. I love my alcohol free life….232 days! Wooohoo

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        • Because I was sober today, babysitting my beautiful granddaughters unexpectedly was a joy, because I also wasn’t hungover. 26 days and counting. Grateful for this life.

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    • Am going with because i am sober today i am claiming my identity and relishing my sober mind with all my senses. Clearly i am amazed by my voice-sober noting different tones blending with situations as they present.

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  28. Because I was sober today I woke up shame and anxiety free and no self loathing…444 days AF sober school grad…..thank you Kate! I love getting your emails in my box….they are always such a positive reminder that I’m on the right path.

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    • That’s amazing Liz! 444 days! I’m so happy to hear all is well ❤️

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  29. Because I was sober today, I have hope that this time will work for me.

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    • Hi Leona – just checking in to make sure you have a plan to follow and lots of help and support around you? It’s hard figuring this out on your own. I just looked up your email address on my system and I can see you’ve been following me for several years. If sobriety hasn’t clicked for you yet, it’s probably time to do something different. Here are some more details about my class: https://thesoberschool.com/course/

      Reply
  30. because I had lunch with a close friend was able to drive without a hangover and received from her a beautiful gift thanking me for my friendship and support.

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    • That’s wonderful. It sounds as if your friend really appreciates you Net.

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  31. Because I was sober today…. I feel amazingly fantastic!!! Day #60 and so happy that I have been able to look at drinking in a whole new light, get educated on the whys, been afforded the opportunity to meet some incredibly courageous and really neat women around the world who are successfully managing their new lives living AF, and probably most important, thrilled to have met Kate Bee and feel like it has been such a blessing to join this course! It’s wonderful to wake up clear headed, sleep well through the night, be able to pause and breather deep when feeling stressed and think about the whys and deal with the stressors differently. Knowing that my feelings, conversations and relationships with others are genuine and true make me feel more confident. I am truly blessed today and are extremely grateful to be where I am right here and now. Thank you for all your support Ladies, you have made a huge difference in getting me here today!

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    • I can feel how happy you are Dianne – you sound in a very good place! And I’m so delighted to hear you’re on Day 60. Congratulations!! ❤️

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  32. Because I was sober today – I feel free! After getting drunk on Thursday, August 8, I woke up in the middle of the night so angry at myself for not being able to moderate again. On August 9th before getting out of bed I told my husband I can’t drink anymore. I’m done. Here comes Day 1. Thanks to your Unstuck Class, your support, and all the other wonderful women I’m still going strong. I’ll definitely give thanks for my sobriety over these next days!

    Reply
    • That’s fantastic Barb. Many, many congratulations on your sobriety. Here’s to freedom!

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  33. Because I was sober today, I jumped out of bed at 5:28 a.m. (What? unheard of after two bottles of wine at night). I spent a good 30 minutes reviewing my second language course work! Coming up 5 months and I am not looking back

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    • Brilliant – congratulations on your 5 months Carrie!

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    • Wow absolutely fantastic. Super woman

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  34. I am so grateful for this website, blog, everything Kate and you amazing women share here. I found this about a year ago and I made a decission in February 2019 that I will not drink alone anymore. Now I have been 71 days totally sober and so many things in my life are better: no more hangover. It feels wonderful. Because I was sober today, I was happy to wake up and start a new day

    Reply
    • It sounds as if alcohol-free living suits you! Congratulations on your 71 days 🙂

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  35. Well done! You are a champion xx

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  36. Because I was sober today I was fully present with my children after school, during homework and dinner. I honestly enjoyed every second. Now I’m gonna take a hot bath and start a brand new book. Feeling amazing and excited for a fresh morning tomorrow.

    Reply
    • Well done congratulations. Be proud of yourself xxx

      Reply

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