I want to highlight two things that might be making your life harder right now.
Particularly if you’re in early sobriety – or you’re trying to quit drinking at the moment.
It’s all about the way we talk to ourselves… and what we do when we’re feeling unmotivated.
If you’ve ever muttered to yourself, “What the hell is wrong with me?” I think you’ll get a lot out of this video.
Stop shaming yourself when you make mistakes
Imagine a child came to you and said they’d failed a test at school. Would you say, “Oh my god, what’s wrong with you? You’re such a failure! I’m so ashamed of you.” You wouldn’t say that, right? Instead, you’d help them figure out what to do next.
In sobriety, many of us say the most horrible things to ourselves and it’s totally pointless. You can’t shame yourself into quitting. A better approach is to look at what went wrong. What can you learn from this? What help do you need? What will you do differently next time?
Stop waiting until you feel motivated
Are you putting off sobriety because you’re waiting until you feel motivated? That isn’t the approach we’d take with our kids if they didn’t feel like doing their homework or going to school. We wouldn’t let them skip school until they feel like going again.
Feeling unmotivated isn’t a cue to give up. Instead ask, “Am I willing? I might not feel motivated, but am I willing to stay focused and keep going with this? Am I willing to do this right now, for the version of me tomorrow who will be very glad that I stuck with this?”
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