If you’re scared you can’t quit drinking, worried what other people will think or daunted by the idea of managing life without alcohol, you’re not alone.
Fear keeps so many people stuck in an unhappy relationship with alcohol. The thought of changing can be genuinely scary.
But there are a couple of things about fear that I wish I’d known a lot earlier – and I thought today might be a good day to talk about them 🎃👻
I explain more in this week’s video.
The problem with fear
Your brain has not evolved in the same way that your environment has. You have a primitive brain walking around in a modern-day world. Back in our cavewoman days, it was useful to be afraid of a lot of things: you needed to be scared of what was hiding in the woods.
Today, fear is still useful when we’re in genuinely dangerous situations. But to be honest, that doesn’t happen all that often nowadays. In reality, most of the things we’re afraid of today aren’t perilous at all. We might try to avoid being embarrassed or judged, for example. Unpleasant? Yes. But not dangerous.
What are you really afraid of?
When you look at common fears around alcohol-free living, what it tends to come down to is that most people are afraid of experiencing a feeling that they think will be unpleasant. Like being vulnerable, or failing at something (like trying to quit drinking).
But what is a feeling? It’s just a vibration in your body. It can be helpful to remember that. And not all ‘bad’ emotions are intolerable. In fact, some people will choose to spend money on watching a scary movie today, knowing that it will make them feel terror, uncertainty and dread!
What would you do if you weren’t afraid?
If judgement, failure or feeling awkward didn’t scare you, how could things be different? When we make decisions based on our fears, things rarely go well. Nothing good ever comes from sitting around thinking about all the reasons why you can’t do something.
In other areas of life, you tend to automatically focus on the positives. When you apply for that job or try that new thing, you might feel scared, but your focus is on what you might gain. You can do the same thing with sobriety too. What if your decision to quit drinking turned out to be the best thing you ever did for yourself?
Looking for help and support to create a spooktacular, alcohol-free life you love? My Getting Unstuck course will transform your relationship with booze and yourself. Click here for more details.