Quick question: do you genuinely like the feeling of being drunk?
I know this seems like a strange thing to ask.
Back in my drinking days, I would’ve dismissed this question without even thinking about it. Of course I liked the feeling of being drunk! Doh.
But to be honest, I never stopped to properly think about the physical sensation of getting drunk. And actually… when you really analyse it… it’s quite a strange thing.
Like I said, you need an open mind for this conversation, but if you’re open to questioning this important element of drinking, this video is for you.
Keypoints
Step into someone else’s shoes
When we’re analysing the physical sensation of being drunk, it helps to think about someone who never normally drinks. Picture a teetotal friend, a child or young adult. What would their experience be, if they were tricked into consuming alcohol?
Perhaps you can remember your first ever drink. What was that like? Personally I didn’t like it. The room began to spin and I felt awful. It wasn’t very relaxing or fun. The feeling of being drunk was horrible. (But this didn’t put me off. I was sold on alcohol before I even drank it.)
Stick to the facts
Drop any romantic or cute language and nail down the facts. When you feel drunk you tend to get a bit dizzy and lightheaded. You might feel a bit slow and out of control. Your vision, speech and coordination may change.
If you had to take some medication and the side effects included an inability to think clearly, speak articulately or control your actions – and the risk of vomiting, heart disease and cancer – you’d probably be alarmed, not excited.
So why do we romanticise the feeling of being drunk?
Alcohol is the most normalised and glamorised drug on the planet. We grow up watching the adults around us drink. We’re brainwashed into thinking booze is a good thing before we’re old enough to have our first glass. Hence why I’d decided drinking was a good thing, despite my lived experience of it.
The language we use to describe alcohol use is very positive as well. When we talk about other drugs, we say people are getting a fix, getting high, or using. But with booze we’re just ‘getting tipsy’ or ‘feeling a bit merry’.
The good news…
If we can convince ourselves that using alcohol is fun – despite it being a toxic, cancer-causing substance that makes us feel ill – then we can talk ourselves into quitting too.
If we can believe that it’s fun to be zombified, then we can use that same brain power to get excited about sobriety too. We can start telling ourselves a better, sexier story about living life alcohol free and showing up for our one and only life.
Ready to create an alcohol-free life you love? Click here to learn more about my Getting Unstuck course.
27 responses
I really don’t like the feeling of being drunk as I know how I’m going to feel the next day. My problem isn’t excess, it’s consistency, ie I have a couple of glasses of wine a night, sometimes 3 (medium glasses) and it’s a habit I’d really like to break. It catches up with me now and again when I have to have a break because I don’t feel well but I’m straight back to the routine after one night. It’s annoying, costly and debilitating. I often don’t drink when I go out and that doesn’t bother me as I enjoy my 2 or 3 glasses in front of the tv the most.
I’d really love to help you break that cycle Joanne. Check out these success stories from some of my previous students. I think you’ll find them truly inspiring: https://thesoberschool.com/success-stories/
Thank you Kate for all your advice, been there , I am still drinking but don’t get in the click any more. I am glad to spend time with my grandchildren but still missing that special person in my life, we are all individuals and seeking the day, keep in touch Kate, xxx
Excellent post! As I was listening, I immediately thought of my two daughters drinking alcohol and how upsetting the sensations would be for them- and for me to observe! I’m so glad you are here posting practical, straightforward messages such as this one. It really resonates with me as I approach my one-year alcohol free (November 25).
Hi Liz, Huge congratulations on your first soberversary. What an amazing milestone for you. It really does put things into perspective when we think about them in just a slightly different way. Keep going Liz!
Very interesting. I hope I have an open mind. It’s not the fun that I thought especially now I’m 68 and might die in my sleep. Actually I hate the morning after when I’m depressed and thoughts all over the place. I love the actual sitting in front of the telly and drinking, on my own.
Hi Jacinta, The consequences of getting drunk are not fun at all. If you’d like some support to find new healthier ways to enjoy your evening in front of the telly without the consequences my online coaching programme would be a great fit for you. Here are some more details: https://thesoberschool.com/course/
Hi Jacinta, that really resonates with me. More and more I look around see the devastation alcohol has brought to my life, it has to stop … but just one more while I watch my favourite show ♀️ I’m definitely up for the next Getting Unstuck, Kate talks so much sense!
Hi Kate I’ve never been drunk so don’t know what’s that’s like I don’t drink a bottle I have too glasses a night and never drink in the day it doesn’t cross my mind to drink in the day ? And I wouldn’t want to
Hi Sandra, That’s really interesting. If your drinking is worrying you I know I can help you. Check out my online coaching programme here: https://thesoberschool.com/course/
I don’t drink to be drunk, I drink as it’s become habit. Most nights (let’s be honest, every night virtually) I will have up to a bottle of wine. Sometimes on another night I’ll have a couple of bourbon and cokes as I know I can’t drink too many of them. It’s the habit.. using it as a crutch that’s the issue and something I need to work on for sure
Hi Karen, It’s great that you’ve recognised that you’re using alcohol as a crutch. If you’d like some support to figure this out my online coaching programme would be a great fit for you. Here are some more details: https://thesoberschool.com/course/
My first drink was a lot like Kate’s. I puked my guts out and didn’t drink for a long time even though it was touted as so much fun. Later in life when I started to drink, I learned to tolerate it. A very good video reminder. I remain AF and thank you again, for this reminder. Our brains are WAY smarter than we give them credit for. Use it for good and not for evil!!
Hi Patricia, Well done, it’s great to see you doing so well.
Hi: As usual Kate hits the spot! I was at 12 weeks sober this summer, but had a two-week trip to Ireland where you just have to have your pints. In my case, wine.
Got COVID on the trip and got home in desperate search of a COVID test and anti-viral meds, then a home flooding disaster, then my birthday hit. Can you have PTSD from a vacation? If so, I have it.
I have to admit, even on my dream/nightmare trip when I was SUPPOSED to be having fun, I wasn’t enjoying drinking. I guess the enjoyment of it is just not what it was in younger days. I’ve just got to take the “counsel of the years” and let it go….
Alcohol free living offers so much more genuine fun and thoroughly enjoyable, restful holidays too I promise you.
Hi Katy
After watching/ listening to you on the 23rd September I decided to accept the challenge of not drinking for the 6 weeks. And… I haven’t had any alcohol from then.
To be honest I feel really pleased to have kept it up with no trouble at all even with a few social events happening. I have enjoyed sourcing 0% drinks eg Gin & Tonic & Pilsner beer. Strangely I get a big kick from putting a green tick on my calendar at the end of each day.
Thankyou Kate – this is down to your words of wisdom & gentle, encouraging manner.
Hi Ruth, You are so welcome. Congratulations on your month of freedom from alcohol. Keep going!
Been sober free since May 24. No regrets. I wake up headache free and look forward to what I’ve planned the day before and do it…. cos I can remember it. Alcohol doesn’t have a place in my life any longer. That’s thanks to Sober School and Kate.
So lovely to hear from you Sheila. It’s true no one ever regrets waking up hangover free.
Dearest Kate,
No, there’s nothing special about being drunk. I want to say I’m so thankful I took your short class (in TN , USA) before the current “Unstuck” class . You suggested we try sobriety for 6 weeks. I’m AF for 30 days.
I feel amazing! I follow you because you are SO real. Just wanted to say “Thank you!”❤️
You are most welcome Debbie and congratulations on your 30 days of freedom. It keeps getting better and better, keep going.
Thought provoking perspective Kate… I remember those first few well actually no a lot of times when the room span, I was physically sick and felt awful the next day… slowly the tolerance built up that the room stopped spinning I’m rarely sick… but I still hate the feeling the next day…. Now it has an added bonus of a bucket load of regret and guilt… I would love to break this
My online coaching programme does exactly that and would be a great fit for you. Here are some more details: https://thesoberschool.com/course/
I feel so stupid.
I don’t drink for a few days and then I go on a sordid little binge.
I am newly retired and I think a lot of it is boredom.and isolation
The shame doesn’t help and in fact makes me drink more
Is anyone else struggling?
Hi Felicity, Alcohol will always give you more of what you don’t want, isolation and boredom will be worse because of it. You may find this other blog of Kate’s helpful: https://thesoberschool.com/being-good-monday-thursday/
I like reading g these comments as you don’t feel alone . Like I said in my earlier comment I don’t feel ready to give up fully but I do want to stop my drinking at home alone. This all started with Covid as I was feeling isolated as I had to stay in months on end because I am immune suppressed.
Once I fell into the habit it is harder to get out of!
But I am getting worried about drinking at home alone. I am 66 , I can have phone calls with people including my own children and can’t remember what was said at times. Then I get annoyed at myself and tell myself I won’t drink on the weekends again but I do!!!
Whatever happens between now and the New Year I am definitely doing sober January whether I am in on my own or out with friends . I did do sober October and raised money for a charity a few years ago so I know I can do it . I just need to focus and want to do it and joining this group hopefully will help me along . Who knows I may go for the full sobriety as I feel better in myself . Thanks for listening .