If you’ve tried to quit drinking a few times already and it hasn’t worked out, I know you might be feeling pretty fed up.
It can be tempting to say, “What’s the point? I may as well not even bother.” And it can start to feel risky to try again and get your hopes up.
But before you walk away, I’ve got a pep talk for you.
If you need a reminder that some of the biggest wins are built on a stack of setbacks hardly anyone talks about… this video is for you.
Key points:
You’re in the losing part of winning
One of my favourite quotes is: “Winners lose more than losers ever will.” And it’s true. Behind every successful person are so many failed attempts. For example, JK Rowling had the Harry Potter manuscript rejected 12 times. Oprah was fired from her first TV job. Lady Gaga got dropped by her first record label. And I tried and failed to quit drinking more times than I can count – but I’m now 13 years sober! Failure is simply part of success.
Look at your practical strategy
Ok, as well as giving you a pep talk, I want to make a practical recommendation. Do you actually have a plan for when a craving hits, or are you just hoping for the best? Think about what you might do in that moment. Do you know how to handle stress without reaching for a drink? That’s a common trigger too. Plan for this stuff now – and get help if you’re not sure how to handle these moments (this is one of the things I can support you with on my Getting Unstuck course).
Check your mindset
Long term, you don’t want sobriety to feel like a restrictive diet, or like the love of your life has been ripped away from you. The goal isn’t to spend your life heroically resisting something you secretly wish you could have. It’s to change how you see alcohol, so not drinking starts to feel like the better deal. You’ll know this is an area you need to work on if you feel like you’re missing out when everyone else has a glass of wine, or if you’re romanticising it a lot. This is the kind of work we tackle inside Getting Unstuck.
Give yourself another chance
What else in life have you been bad at, to begin with – but you kept going anyway and eventually nailed it? For me, it was learning to drive. I had lessons for about a year because I just couldn’t get it! Maybe for you it was something at work, or parenting, or a qualification. You didn’t quit those things just because you weren’t instantly good at them. Bring that same mindset here. The figuring-out stage is messy because change is messy. But it’s worth it, so please don’t give up.
Ready to create an alcohol-free life you love? Click here to learn more about my Getting Unstuck course.
8 responses
Your video was so on-spot for me! Thank you. I go through “goof ups” (failures) daily with piano. That being said, nothing beats the feeling of nailing a piece as one plugs along. This has just happened for me with a difficult classical piece I struggled with a year ago; now it is almost ready for Halloween! Same with any doubts I had about drinking – I am not going to give up, or into, the feelings of pride I have in myself! No glass of wine can do that, nor ever has, to be honest. Again, many thanks.
I’m really glad the video hit the spot for you. And wow, your piano progress sounds amazing. That feeling of finally nailing something you once struggled with is just unbeatable. The same goes for your alcohol‑free pride, nothing compares to that.
The perfect Pep Talk. I have been struggling but having listened to it twice I am thinking more positively again. Thank you.
You are most welcome! Feel free to check out my students’ success stories on my website; they are a big dose of positivity. 🙂 https://thesoberschool.com/success-stories/
I needed the pep talk today. Thank you, Kate.
Glad it was helpful!
Your pep talk helps and your wine o’clock guide really helpful when you think you might want a wine
You’re very welcome, your morning self will thank you for swerving a glass of wine!