When I was trying to quit drinking, I kept coming up against the same problem.
Stopping from Monday to Thursday was ok. It was more or less achievable (unless I had a super stressful week.)
But the weekends? They were totally different.
For a long time, I just couldn’t get my head around the idea of being sober on a Friday and Saturday night.
And yet every Monday started the same way: with me regretting how much time I’d wasted drinking and feeling hungover.
I wish I’d known back then just how amazing alcohol-free weekends can be. They’re a MASSIVE lifestyle upgrade.
If you need some inspiration to make next weekend different from the last, this blog is for you.
Here are 8 reasons not to drink next weekend.
1. You’ll give your body what it really needs
By the end of the week, most of us are tired. Drinking can seem comforting because it provides a brief, artificial high – but then what happens? You sleep badly and don’t get the rest you need.
Listening to your body and going to bed early on a Friday might not sound very rock n roll, but hey – passing out on the sofa isn’t exactly wild either!
2. You can relax properly
Here’s something you’re missing out on when you drink: the feeling of genuine, real life relaxation. It’s so different from the fake sensation created by booze. Drinking actually puts your body under a lot of stress, as the author Jason Vale explains:
“Alcohol causes low blood sugar, drains the body of water, overworks the liver, pancreas and kidneys and leeches oxygen from the brain. That doesn’t sound very relaxing to me…”
3. You’ll actually get stuff done
As a drinker, I should’ve won medals for my ability to procrastinate. Boring, straightforward chores morphed into gigantuan tasks that were put off until the very last second.
These days, that kind of stuff gets done and dusted with the minimal amount of fuss. That means I have time to do what I really want to do, which brings me on to my next point…
4. You’ll have more time for fun stuff
Alcohol is such a time thief. A large chunk of my weekend used to be spent drinking, recovering from drinking or doing my other favourite hobby – beating myself up about my drinking! It took up SO much time.
In sobriety, the weekends feel longer and more fulfilling, because you have time to actually do the things you enjoy and make the most of your precious time off.
5. You’ll follow through on your promises
You know that thing you said you’d help your friend with? The Saturday morning park run you’ve been meaning to do for ages? And that family meal you promised you’d organise?
It’s really hard to show up for yourself or other people when your weekend is controlled by a drug that makes you forgetful, sluggish and ultimately not yourself.
6. You’ll have more quality time with the people you care about
Perhaps you’re not able to spend much time with your children or partner during the week, because life is dominated by school runs, homework, commuting, making dinner etc.
If you live for the weekends and love spending time with your family, why let alcohol take you away from them? Why numb out and make that time together less memorable?
7. You’ll lose the Sunday night blues
Alright, so being sober doesn’t mean you’ll skip into work on Monday morning, but you are going to feel so much better when you lose the hangxiety (yes it’s a real thing – read more here)
It’s horrible when Sunday evening rolls around and you’re feeling as tired as you were on Friday night and you’re beating yourself up for drinking too much.
8. You’ll feel so much happier
If you’re reading this after a weekend of heavy drinking, you already know how alcohol affects your self-esteem, confidence and wellbeing. Now take a moment to fast forward to next Monday.
Imagine how great you’ll feel knowing that you’ve made the most of your weekend, overcome a challenge, looked after yourself, followed through on your promises and dared to live life a little differently. It will be so worth it.
Now it’s your turn…
I’ve shared 8 reasons not to drink next weekend, but I’m sure there are many more. So let me know – what motivates you?
Start making a list and keep it close by, so you’re ready for next weekend.
If you need some support to make sobriety stick, click here for details of my online course 🙂
53 responses
Kate, it’s as if you are me! I can relate to all those reasons not to drink at the weekend and this is the 3rd Monday I’ve had hangover free and it’s amazing how different I feel today. I used to dread Mondays and after the school run I would head back home as I work from home, push paper around my desk and then invariably give up and go have a nap for a few hours and generally achieve zilch until about Wednesday. It does help that the sun is shining today but I actually feel really positive and optimistic about the future so thank you 🙂 xx
That’s great to hear Sarah – well done on all your alcohol free weekends! 🙂
Sarah, I hear you – my birthday is this weekend and I feel like I am already planning how and why I will sabbotage myself into drinking. But what for? We moved 4 years ago into a beautiful house in an affluent town and I felt like I had arrived – at a STOP sign! It was like I suddenly had no ambition anymore, no drive to create and reach goals. This stay at home mom has basically been keeping the kids alive while I slowly kill myself with bad habits. How am I going to justify to my friends and family that I’m not going to drink on my birthday? Meanwhile if I do stand up for myself and stay sober they will probably sigh with relief that finally I’m finding myself again. Nobody but me really realizes that i have a problem. I dont pass out, I dont drink all day, but I consistently drink everynight and its always about a bottle and a half of white wine and every morning I get up and plan when I am going to have my first drink in the evening and I think about it multiple times a day. That is a problem. Its like my brain is a task force for creating opportunities to have a glass of wine. I should be so ambitious in other areas of my life! I’ll be thinking of you Sarah xo
Laurie, like you I’ve felt stuck in a rut for what seems likes ages. I’ve been feeling so discontented with everything but when I look around there’s seriously not a lot to be unhappy about! I’ve been demotivated, depressed and pretty miserable so I would drink more to make it go away. It’s only been in the last 3 weeks when I decided that I couldn’t go on like this and I quit drinking that things have actually got better, which leads me to realise that it’s the alcohol that was making me demotivated, depressed and miserable. I really wondered where my mojo had gone and how I was going to get it back. I’m only 17 days AF but I’m already feeling a million times better. I’ve even been able to organise a work meeting on a Monday without worrying how on earth I would handle it! I’ve just finished reading Jason Vale’s ‘Kick the Drink Easily’ and it makes so much sense. Happy Birthday for this weekend and I hope you enjoy yourself xx
In addition to the 8 mentioned above you will also save loads of money, you’ll have actual conversations with people and remember them the next day, you can treat yourself with chocolates or other desserts because you are not drinking all of those liquid calories and your skin will look better. I will take all of those benefits over a few (or several) lousy drinks any day!
Me too! Those are some great points, thank you!
I needed this. I have been struggling. This list will help and also the pep talks. Thanks.
You have so much to gain by being alcohol free – and literally, nothing to lose 🙂
Hi Kate just so happy to have found thesoberschool it’s great help on day 15 n feeling really hopeful this time iv tried giving up for almost a decade,,,, before I was drinking without taught If I fancied one it was more like it’s Friday it’s this that the other so drink now when I’m thinking about staying sober I’m shocked I do not fancy one early days but feels good thanks so much ur a dual I spend more time doing my nails mostierising my skin soaking in the bath pampering myself my brains not as confused I’m enjoying
Congratulations on your 15 days Catherine – you’re off to a great start!
Come Saturday night I used to like to relax with my hubby and enjoy wine but inevitablely I would start running my mouth about whatever grievance was bothering me and before I would know it I would be angry and my husband totally shut down emotionally .
Come Sunday we had to talk things out and I had to apologize for my mouth.
He always forgave me but he stored the hurt in his heart .
What a way to spend weekend
Sophie Ann I can totally relate to that as that’s exactly what I used to do and then the next day I could barely remember what all the fuss had been about. My poor long suffering husband 🙁
Argh, it’s such a horrible cycle to be in, right? Here’s to leaving that behind.
I drank too much on Saturday but nothing last night so going to try not to have anything best Saturday and Sunday. I am finding it hard !
Well done for not drinking last night. It sounds as if you could do with some help and support Fiona – it’s really hard to figure this stuff out on your own. I’d be happy to show you how to stop drinking and make it stick. Here the details for my online course – this is the best way to work with me directly: https://thesoberschool.com/course/
Thank you Kate. I had a really stressful day today and would normally have poured my first glass of wine by now but I haven’t. Feeling quite proud of myself.
Having a really hard time not having a few glasses of wine EVERY night. Really about a bottle and a half. Its hard to tell when you buy it by the box. I never pass out, I never feel wasted, I just feel calmer, BUT I end up staying up too late, sometimes i post stupid things on Facebook and I always snack. So many nights I havr felt like I dont even want to drink, but I DO IT ANYWAY. Whats up with that? I want to stop drinking the way I am, but I dont want to feel,like I CAN NEVER have a drink again.
I’d suggest you take a break from drinking Laurie – for 2 or 3 months. Think of it as an experiment – you’re giving yourself the chance to experience alcohol free living properly. You can always go back to drinking afterwards if you hate it, but first you’ve got to find out what you’re missing out on! Because right now, you really are missing out on a lot of good stuff. (There’s a reason why us sober types rave about alcohol free living!) If you need some help and support to make that break happen, you might like to check out my online course. It’ll guide you through it step by step: https://thesoberschool.com/course/
Laurie – I can so relate! I often don’t even want a drink, but I do anyway. Can’t figure that one out. Then I can never have just one, which means I stay up too late and sometimes post stupid things.
Hi Laurie, I don’t know if Im supposed to do this but you just said exactly how I am. I keep getting theses emails and I read all the comments and think OK let’s do this, then I get home and think it’s only one glass then it turns into a bottle,Occasionally I make it through the week without drinking but no chance at the weekend . After reading Kate’s response to you I think I also need to stop for a long period of time, I think I need to click on some of these help buttons.. Good luck
Regards
Kim
Hi Laurie, I can completely relate to what you are saying, I have a stressful day and then come home and have a couple of very strong whiskies, I do have days when I don’t drink and don’t want to but they are few and far between. My drinking has become more and more frequent over the past 4 years and I am really concerned now that I may not be able to stop or I might get worse. I am terrified of the consequences for my health too. I can’t wait to start Kates course. Good luck many of us are in the same boat and I am sure like me we are not even sure how we got here.
i find that drinking is making me paranoid with my relationship. the reason i want to take a break is to process my emotions on my terms and not have alcohol control my thoughts and words .
when i dont drink during the week by friday i feel so clear minded then i drink and we repeat again .
i got a work thing this evening but ive bought the sparkling water ,. sparkling water is a good trick to use .
best of luck everyone .
Good luck with your work event tonight Sarah – I’m sure you won’t regret staying alcohol free this evening 🙂
Hi Kate, thanks again for another great message of encouragement! Day 24 AF and didn’t drink having dinner with a friend on Saturday or on Sunday at a social event! I got my friend thinking about her drinking now and I’m realizing the positive effects my sobriety can have on others. And I’m sleeping without the help of pills! Have a great week!
Brilliant. It sounds as if this alcohol free lifestyle suits you Mary 🙂
I’m 14 days AF and my concern was/is other people’s reactions to me not drinking and yesterday was the first time it’s really cropped up. I went to my family’s for Sunday lunch and got the comments ‘What you’re not drinking?!’ ‘Why’? ‘How long are you not drinking for?’ ‘But you have to drink as we’re having a Sunday roast!’. I just said I was having a break as I couldn’t deal with their reactions if I said I was planning on taking a break forever!
I have got to the stage where I am wishing the hours away at weekend as it doesn’t seem appropriate to drink before noon! How sad is that?
Telling people you’re taking a break is a perfectly good response for now. If you want any other ideas for what to say, I wrote a blog about this a while back: https://thesoberschool.com/youre-not-drinking/
Thanks Kate, I’ll have a look
I had a dream at the weekend I was sobbing so much looking for someone to help me stop drinking. I am so tired of the cycle and self disgust the next day. I drink half a bottle of wine every week night and at least a full bottle Friday sat and Sunday if I’m not working. So thank you for the support and roll on your course in April. I am working all weekend so I won’t be drinking. So my Wednesday and Thursday will be difficult. But I am determined to be alcohol free this week.
I look forward to having you on the course in April Kate. For now – keep stringing those sober days together, as it all counts. You’ve got so much to gain from doing this 🙂
March 15th I will be 11 months AF. I find that my place is cleaner and my head is much clearer. Thanks to finding the Sober School, I will be celebrating 1 yr AF April 15th!! Thanks Kate!
Yay, I’m so pleased for you Renee! Well done and many congratulations 🙂
I’m on another day one. I’ve made a list of my “why” this morning and reading your blog today has filled me with determination. I feel like if I can just get through a week it will spur me on to keep going. When I’m on my nights off from work I’ll make sure I have something planned to fill the time. Perhaps I’m not planning enough and that’s why I keep failing. So here we go, best foot forward and nearly into a new month. Wish me luck
Well done for making your list of ‘why’ – that’s a great start. Planning definitely helps – you need to know what you’re going to do at wine o’clock to deal with your triggers and cope with any uncomfortable emotions in a different way. So brainstorm that now. If you’d like some help to make sobriety stick properly (in a way that actually makes you feel good about alcohol free living!) definitely check out my course. It’s a step by step guide to stopping drinking 🙂
Here are the details: https://thesoberschool.com/course/
Just keep your head up Jan. You will e fine, don’t beat yourself up about it. We all make mistakes,whats inportant is not giving up
What motivates me?
No more horrible hangovers- sweating, shaking, throwing up.. no more wondering what I said, what I did, where my car is..no more regrets.. living in the present moment, enjoying my sleep and my weekends with my family and friends
Yes! These are very powerful reasons – thank you for sharing them 🙂
Hi Kate,
I realize this blog is intended for women, but I relate to everything you write 100%. It’s almost creepy how your experiences are, literally, what I feel. I work Wednesday-Sunday, so my weekend starts today. You’re right, the work week is easy. But my days off?? Almost impossible. Today, the first email I received was your current words of advice on the weekend downtime. I’m going to use my day to clean, do laundry, run errands and relax tonight. I love waking up and feeling good. When drinking, I’d wake up at 5 and feel miserable and exhausted, yet I couldn’t get back to sleep. I can’t do that anymore. I’ve made a list of all the reasons I don’t want to drink. I made it when I was feeling awful and regretting having drank. I wrote to myself “DO NOT FORGET THIS FEELING!!!” It’s onky been 6 days, but I think this time I can do it. Thank you!
Congratulations on your 6 days JR. Wishing you many, many more!
I can say that hangxiety is one of the most horrible and distressing feelings ever.
If I ever need to remind myself of why I don’t drink, I remind myself of that feeling of dread and fear, and I’m so glad I don’t do that to myself anymore – giving up drinking is probably the best decision I’ve ever made for myself.
Thank you Kate for these reminders, always inspiring.
The hangxiety is so real. I used to cover it up with more booze after work until I could pass out. Then waking up around 3am and not being able to go back to sleep. That caused more stress and anxiety. It is so gross to do this to myself. I have had several weeks AF and I definitely felt better. But I still have these cravings to drink one. And doing that doesn’t make me feel better. I can actually feel how bad it is for me but I don’t stop at one. Our culture really romanticizes alcohol and I have to stop buying into that. It is a poison for me and not working anymore.
These blogs are really helpful. Sometimes I think you all are reading my mind. Especially the health fanatic during the day but the wino at night. And the 8 reasons to not drink during the weekend. I have a birthday weekend coming up and I really want it to be peaceful and AF.
Hangxiety is the absolute worst! And I agree – stopping drinking is one of my best decisions too.
I admire you all. I wish I had the willpower. Wish I could find something else to ease my heartache.
Stopping drinking isn’t really about willpower – at least, it isn’t with the approach I teach. Please do check out my course for further support Deborah (here are the details: https://thesoberschool.com/course/ )
It’s very hard to process or deal with grief when you’re drinking. Sober, we can help you find some new coping mechanisms that support you, without causing any nasty side effects. Keep going Deborah 🙂
Day8 for me today… Had my first AF wweekend last weekend, kept myself busy with gym and church. Saturday just went to the mall and walked around. Knowing that i did a whole weekend AF, makes me more confident going into this one. I have’nt stopped smoking yet, I am takling my biggest issue first. Don’t want to strain my brain. I’ll quit in my 3rd month of sobriety
One thing at a time is generally the best approach. Well done on your 8 days!
Thank you Kate 🙂
16 days AF, starting my third week at work without the dreaded booze blues! I have been out to dinner a few times and it hasn’t bothered me but I am waiting for the moment when I will want a drink. I have had great sleeps ….probably too much!! I had tried to give up drinking years ago but for some reason this time it seems easy or like its my time. My weekends are so much better and I feel more confident and able to handle whatever challenges. I do still have the niggling at the back of my mind…what do I do if I want a drink.
Not waking up with unexplained bruises on my legs and arms; not having to worry at work whether people can see my red wine tongue and smell merlot breathe; calmed, less paranoid thinking. I could go on…I’ve only been 9 days sober.
So true Kate! I use to suffer terribly with Sunday night blues. They are now a thing of the past. This weekend will be my eighth soba weekend and I never imagined how much I’d love them!
Well done Becky! That’s great to hear 🙂
What a great blog! I’m glad I’ve come across this. You have an amazing positive approach on how to go about change. I really like that there is no labelling “alcohol abuse” “alcoholic” I really cannot tolerate those labels. For me, I started drinking mid-teens, unfortunately I had this paradigm that alcohol was glamourous and romantic, exciting and fun (not). I resonate with everything you say re weekends. It’s how to create a sober plan. I’m in my 40’s and feel the fun aspect is gone from alcohol. I no longer getting a buzz or a high as my tolerance is so high. I live in an extremely judging society so I’m isolated and cannot talk about it. I work very hard, have kids to look after and then my romantic affair with the bottle of wine starts anytime from 8pm. I’m so angry with myself right now. As my biggest concern is the concern for my health. It’s a high risk toxic substance , high risk of cancer and liver disease. I gave up smoking late 20’s and never looked back. I’m determined to give up this dangerous habit but fear I have already caused damage. I’m sorry I’m just really mad at myself right now.