When you walk past a pub garden and you see people drinking in the sunshine, what’s the first thought that runs through your head?
Is it: “I’m so jealous, I want a drink too!” or “Lucky them…” or “Perhaps I could just have one…”
If you’re trying to take a break from drinking right now, moments like these can make you want to ditch your sober goals.
But before you do, let’s talk about what’s really going on – because I promise, it’s not actually about the drink!
Key points
Everything gets a glow-up at this time of year
It’s the same every spring. All of a sudden, you notice just how light the days are. The temperature is better. The blossom is out along with the bluebells and you feel the relief of winter being over. Everything seems to get a glow-up – including alcohol.
Outside, glasses of wine will literally glint in the sun. (Everything looks better on a sunny day, right?) People sit outside to drink and catch some rays, and you’re noticing that too. All these things can come together like a giant, glowy advert for alcohol!
But what are you really craving?
Let’s go a layer deeper, because there’s more to this than meets the eye. It’s not just about wanting a drink. The true craving might be about you wanting to duck out of your normal obligations. Or you might want to sunbathe and rest. Maybe drinking alcohol is the only way you’ve allowed yourself to do that in the past and drop the things you “should” be doing.
Or perhaps seeing other people drinking in the sun reminds you of the people you love spending time with, and haven’t seen in a while. Or maybe your true craving is for a reward. Or a treat. These are real, legitimate needs and they deserve to be met.
Hear me on this: you do not need to pour a glass of wine to give yourself permission to rest. You do not need alcohol to feel connected to people you love spending time with or to enjoy the sunshine. It’s just that alcohol gets bundled up into so many good experiences, sometimes it’s hard for us to see that.
The darker side that you don’t see
The next time you walk past a buzzing pub garden, remember that all you’re seeing is a snapshot. You are seeing the highlight reel. You’re not seeing what happens later that evening, or the next morning. You cannot see the true cost of what’s in those glasses.
Some people may be very unhappy with their drinking, but we don’t see that from the outside. Some people might be sad, lonely or struggling to hear the conversation. Some “boozers” might not be drinking at all, actually – because alcohol-free drinks aren’t that easy to spot.
Tip 1: Focus your mind on something useful
First things first, make sure you supervise your mind here by asking the right questions. A great question here is: “What am I gaining by staying alcohol free during this spring/summer season?” Stop letting your mind ruminate on the opposite and identify what those benefits are for you.
Tip 2: Satisfy your real craving
Make sure you address the underlying need that’s coming up here. For me, seeing people drink in pub gardens reminds me of carefree afternoons with friends who I don’t see as much as I’d like to anymore. So I make sure I arrange something with them. At other times, I realise that I need some time off too, so I make sure to give myself that. What is it for you?
Let me know…
What do you genuinely need on a sunny day? What’s really behind those cravings? And remember, you can have everything you want without drinking alcohol 😊
Ready to create an alcohol-free life you love? Click here to learn more about my Getting Unstuck course.
